This guy

I know my blog is mostly about autism and so mainly J but this wee guy deserves a mention too. My wee B (sometimes in more ways than one 😜) Sometimes he’s my sanity and other times he drives me insane! He’s only four years old and already in his young life he’s had to come to terms with and understand more than some people will ever have to. He’s an autism sibling. If you read any articles, information or research they will tell you that this is hard. We try our best to limit this for him and to make his life as ‘normal’ as possible but he’s always going to be affected by it in some way. J is after all his big brother. Sometimes if I think about it too deeply it makes me really sad for B. As great as J is and as hard as he tries, he’s never really going to be what most people think of as a big brother. He doesn’t really know how to look after B or show him how to do new things. Of course, B is very capable and would probably just tell J that he knew how to do it anyway. This doesn’t mean he’s not missing out though. He’s never known any different and hasn’t seen what he’s missing, which is good I suppose, but I know and sometimes it hurts.

They love to play together (when they are not fighting) and have lots of fun. I suppose most siblings of their age are similar in that way. The thing is, it’s mainly on J’s terms, when J wants to. Occasionally he will join in when B asks but usually he would rather watch a video on his iPad, play with his trains or swirl some water. When he does play it’s mainly running around or rough & tumble play and not the imaginative, interactive play B now likes.

In many ways I suppose B is the big brother. He shows J how to do things and helps him with things he finds hard. He also helps me out, running to fetch new clothes or nappies when J has gotten in a mess in the garden or soaked himself playing with the water. This allows me to keep J in one place and save him rampaging through the rest of the house leaving debris or puddles in his wake. He’s also now an actual big brother to W and has loved it from the minute she arrived. He was so excited for her coming and has enjoyed his role since the day he met her. She often laughs and giggles at his funny faces and noises and he tells her stories or sings her songs when she’s crying. He’s a great big brother and she’s lucky he loves her so much.

B takes all of his responsibilities so seriously and is always looking after his brother and sister. He has his wee hang ups and my husband likes to call him Mr Health & Safety or Mr Terms & Conditions. We can definitely say he is a stickler for the rules and likes things to be done properly. If you’re not doing something the right way, he’s quick to let you know. This can be a good thing but it also sometimes means he’s a bit scared to do things and he overthinks things a lot of the time. He seems to have big worries for someone so small and at times I wish he was a little more carefree and less bothered by things. It would be nice for him to have more confidence and be a little less self-conscious and anxious.

This doesn’t mean he doesn’t have fun. He still has a mischievous side and he loves to wind people up. He likes to go on adventures and see new places. Oh and boy does he like a selfie! His favourite places are the park and Summerlee museum and he loves to be outdoors. When he’s not outside, he loves to do craft activities or imaginative play and we are always drinking pretend tea and eating the lovely food he has prepared for us in his kitchen that Santa brought. Now and again he tries to involve J, who sometimes very briefly plays along before getting fed up and moving on. I hope this will change and as W gets older he will have a new friend to join him in his exploits. He’s my amazing wee boy and he loves life, even if he does have his wee peculiar thoughts and feelings about it along the way.

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20 thoughts on “This guy

  1. I was crying while reading this. B is such a jewel and J is so bless to have him.

    I am crying because I have as sister. She is younger. A lot of times my saviour. I have been having a rough time lately and I dont know what will ever happen to me without her on the other side. A younger sister and stepping up when needed.

    I havent seen my sister for almost 6 years and I am aching to see her. This post made me rememeber how much I miss her. I miss her. I am so lucky to have her and I wish I can give my son as sibling because having one is such a wonderful thing in the world.


    Liked by 1 person

  2. Aw such beautiful pictures of your family and a lovely tribute to B. I can imagine it must be hard for him in ways but the bond between your 3 is brilliant and will be there forever. Lovely reading this and getting to know your family a bit more #fabfridaypost

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh he’s lush! Like you say, he doesn’t know any different and that’s just his family, his brother. He sounds a lot like my daughter, a stickler for the rules and a perfectionist. Luckily, she’s relaxing as she gets older. Thanks for joining us at the #bigpinklink

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  4. OMG! What a lovely cute and caring little guy. He is just so adorable! Lovely photos too. I love the one when he is behind his sister swing with the sunset behind. So beautiful! Thank you so much for linking up your wonderful story with us on #FabFridayPost xx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Beautiful children and a beautiful post hun. It sounds like B is a fab younger and older brother, and gas such a caring nature about him, you must be very proud. I can understand how difficult it must be to watch it happening the other way round. But as they get older, age isn’t so important what’s important is love and caring. Thanks so much for linking up at #fortheloveofBLOG. Claire x

    Liked by 1 person

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